A Frappuccino Too Far

An Irony Deficiency Award goes to Starbucks CEO Howard Schultz, who, having systematically destroyed coffee culture, now complains to anyone who will listen that coffee culture has been destroyed. I feel you, Howard. Fortunately I can just trot on down to authentic barista Torrefazione — oops, no, Starbucks bought them up just to shut them down. Well, at least there’s Coffee People — oops, no, another local beneficiary of Starbucks’ efforts to become the McCoffee by eliminating the competition. But Schultz’s lack of irony is still inspiring: I’m rereading Julius Caesar’s Conquest of Gaul to see if he complains about the Gauls being surly.

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